My Friends
By Hisham Matar
Published 2024
Read Feb 2025
Friendship, the impact of a single moment’s decision on a life, longing for home and family: These are major themes of this newest book by Hisham Matar. This is the first book this reader has experienced by this author.
The book centers on Khaled, an eventual ex-pat in London from Benghazi, Libya. He went to the University of Edinburg to study literature. His father, a man with a PhD from Cario University, cautions him to “not get drawn in”, a piece of advice that the young man really doesn’t fully understand. There are other Libyan students at U Edinburgh, and he enjoys conversation with them. One of them, Mustafa, suggests Khaled join him for a protest in London at the Libyan Embassy. They will wear masks so no one can recognize them. Although not particularly interested in politics, Khaled agrees to go, and his life is changed forever. During the protest, Libyan troops fire upon the protesters from inside the embassy, killing several protesters and a journalist and injuring others. (This actually happened in 1984.) Khaled and Mustafa are among those injured and taken to hospital. Khaled is severely hurt and spends several months in the hospital. The friends are uncertain whether their actual identities were revealed but must now assume they have been and so enter a situation of being exiles from their country. Fortunately, Khaled and Mustafa get asylum in the UK after the incident and gets some help from others to find a place to live. To keep his family safe, Khaled must lie to his family about his circumstances and why he isn’t returning for summer breaks, or essentially forever.
Khaled also meets Hosam, the author of a story he heard with his father while still in Libya which requires his own exile to the UK. After Hosam and Khaled each determine they won’t be betrayed by this new acquaintance, they enter a new stage in their relationship. Khaled, Hosam, and Mustafa meet monthly for intellectual discussions and become good friends.
Each exile takes a different path over the years with respect to career. When the 2011 Arab spring arrives, their approach to life becomes even more distinct. Mustafa returns to Libya to fight against Gaddafi’s regime. Hosam returns to Libya to be with his family for awhile but then returns first to London and then leaves for California with his wife and child to live in a house his exiled father bought in the distant past. Khaled stays in London in the same apartment he’s always been in since leaving the hospital and stays a teacher where he’s been for some time.
Khaled watches as Hosam leaves for America and recalls something his father once told him regarding friends: you only need one or two that you can trust and that provide you pleasure.
A discussion this reader attended suggested Khaled’s apparent lack of engagement is disappointing. However, this quote gave this reader a different view: “I have managed, Mother, not to want a different life most of the time” Khaled imagines saying, “and that is some achievement.” This reader agrees. And this statement taught this reader that expectations this reader holds for others should be questioned and probably abandoned.
In addition to providing a truly stirring story about friendship, it also teaches about being an exile and it led this reader to learn more about the 2001 Arab Spring. For these reasons, this reader is very grateful to the author.
MarshaReads.com 